Wicked....

How did I go my whole gay life without seeing Wicked. I read the book. Not until tonight, I know that is my favorite Musical besides Mama Mia. I related so much to the Wicked witch of the west. An outcast trying to be good. Tricked into things. Split from the one she loves. It was just amazing. I laughed, I cried(lots), and I even sang a bit(i knew a few songs just the soundtrack) The lights and the changing of sets and costumes. It was great. The actors put their heart and soul into this soul. I got chills many of times and felt the pain or happiness they were going through. I was just so moved and didn't want the musical to end. Plus everyone talking in a british accent made it better! If you haven't seen Wicked. YOU MUST!!!! It's WORTH it!

English Holiday

Today we met up with my friend david again and explored south London along the Thames River. Saw Big Ben, Houses or Parliament, Eye of London, Changing of the Guards are Buckingham Palace, St Paul's and two pubs. The more time I am spending here. The more I want to live here! Off to see wicked tonight!

London Calling

So far our trip we have made it to London. It feel like I'm in the movie Eurotrip, except not with a group of friends. Just John and I. Dallas airport was hell. Thunderstorms and everyone trying to get on the plane we were on. And Abilene texas is a shit hole! Don't go. But i am glad that we are here. We are going to meet of my friends here in london and going to explore Soho! I can't wait!

heartbreaking..

(sophia after her visit to the vet)

There are many things in the world that are heartbreaking.

Getting dumped, the lost of a love one, when someone you love get hurt. This past Friday was a nightmare for us. Our young puppy Sophia some how managed to break here left "Pinky" nail on her paw. There was lots of blood and of course one gay daddy freaking out and the other trying to stay calm about it. We call the Vet to see what could be down. They told us that it happens all the time to dogs and that they would have us come in with her and rip out that nail. My heart raced as i took in this. I didn't want our baby to feel pain or have to go through that. At 2:30 on Friday the Vet saw sophia and gave here some numbing jell at first to have it set in. They took her into the back office to start the process. John and I waited in the front room. Mind you that his vet office is an old house, so not much barriers to stop the sounds. We both her sophia yelp. I wanted to jump to my feet and demand that they stop and let her go. Than a second, and a third. I held back my tears, knowing that this will be good for her and she would not have pain. But during those yelps, I felt her pain. How scared she was to be in a strange room with someone about to pull out a broken nail. I just wanted to be there to pet her and give her comfort. I held on to John hoping that it was over and we could just take out baby home from such a tough day. It ended well with she was fine, just shaken up. She has to wear as collar so she can not lick her wound. As well she is on some antibiotics. She has been sleeping all day and will try to lick her paws. I am glad that part is over and hope that she does not have to do that again!

D

14 hours and counting..

til London town is calling!

I will be blogging from there. Be sure to check out my pictures on here as well as on facebook!

Love ya!

Derek

I never noticed..

I have the most handsome partner!

Pride....PDX Style

Pride this year was fun. I got to see lots of friends. I forgot how it feels to be in a really friendly

city. I already miss em.

Teamwork..

Something my students use to sing over and over again while picking up the classroom. This weekend was no different. We hosted some of our friends over to take in the beautiful Seattle sun. Five of my closes friend's were invited over for a BBQ. I really wish i took some pictures. But Hamburgers, hot dogs, wine, beer, hor'dourves, and my mother's potato salad. It was a nice way to whine down our weekend. But the point of this blog is that we worked as a team. A good team for a fact. While he took care of everything outside, I was inside cleaning the house, preparing dishes and last minute things around the house. When it came time for our guest to arrive we greeted them and offered drinks and food. John is a master on the grill. It was like we were yin and yang. We were matched. It was a great BBQ. Plus we got some of our friends to sing some Abba on this video game we own on the PS3.

We also went to a Underwear Fashion show to Benefit the Chicken soup Brigade in Seattle. It was a night of Hotties in some really tight undies! They raised a lot money and it was fun to ogle the models. All of them were from the running group I am with. Overall this weekend was a blast. I'm going to Portland this coming week. Who is ready for me? BTW here is some pictures for the Fashion show.

Pictures taken by Philip Fortier.

When does one give up...

On hope...

First we need to define the word hope.

hope

  noun, verb, hoped, hop·ing.

–noun

1.

the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best: to give up hope.

2.

a particular instance of this feeling: the hope of winning.

3.

grounds for this feeling in a particular instance: There islittle or no hope of his recovery.

4.

a person or thing in which expectations are centered: Themedicine was her last hope.

5.

something that is hoped for: Her forgiveness is my constant hope.

I am using it as 1. is doing so. A feeling... what makes this feeling. When it feels like everything is turning against you. Where does one turn too? Friends, family, support groups? A partner. One thing I have learned about myself is that i like to run away from my problems. Whether it be exchanging words with a friend or partner. A bill that i can't pay or some other major. I have in the past ran away. I ran away from family before, partners, bills, and now myself. What makes one do such things. Being ashamed..full of emotions, not knowing how to get out. Sometimes i believe that my hope is over. I believe that someways that if i disappeared that my life would be better. I could start a fresh life and no one would know me. I thought this method would work for me. Until I met a partner who supports me.

Tonight life hit him and all i could do was yell at him. I was not supportive as he is to me. I did not understand why he was so emotional. What was going on in his life. What could of upset him. I instead turned on him. Making him feel worst, closing himself from me. I felt like I have let him down. All the support he has given me I turned myself into a Jackass. I promise from here on out, that I will try to be supportive in my partner. Only in a calm and respective way. No more turning in around on him. I will listen to him and be there for him.

No more running away!