The mean reds....

Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?
Paul Varjak: The mean reds, you mean like the blues?
Holly Golightly: No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?

I am Holly Golightly. In the famous movie Breakfast at Tiffany's Audrey Hepburns character discirbes them as a horrible thing there like the blues only the blues is for when your sad the mean reds are for when you scared and you dont know what your scared of... I am currently feeling like this. It's hard. I feel like this character was written about me even through I wasn't born yet. I relate to her so much. Her real name in the movie not Holly... Like mine is not Derek. She's the life of the party surrounded by friends and acquaintances. She is a hard worker and came from a not so good family. "It's the mistake you always made, Doc, trying to love a wild thing. You were always lugging home wild things. Once it was a hawk with a broken wing... and another time it was a full-grown wildcat with a broken leg. Remember? You musn't give your heart to a wild thing. The more you do, the stronger they get, until they're strong enough to run into the woods or fly into a tree. And then to a higher tree and then to the sky. "

*Sigh*.....

Leroy Derek Michael Chavez